How 'real' are you while inworld?

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Permalink Reply by Isadora Fiddlesticks on March 27, 2008 at 1:41am

I tend to be myself 100% of the time in Second Life, yet there are situations in world in which I find myself responding in a way that my RL self would probably react to differently. My avatar in SL is better looking in places where in RL i would pay dearly to change, and because of that has made me respond to situations differently. This sometimes makes me ask myself if this is because of the environment, or if this is the real me.

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Permalink Reply by Jaysen Katscher on March 27, 2008 at 11:00am

Thanks, Isadora, for posting here.

I think with a lot of folks, adaptation is the key to survival. Getting into the right groups, the right look, even the right sl-business or job are all parts of making someone into the person that everyone sees. Those things can affect how people react, since you then think with those factors in mind. "Could this come back to my friends? How would they think?"

Even if it isn't about getting the right 'fit' for you, there are those outside forces that can shape your experience. I could have turned out completely different if not for the folks I met when I first hit SL as the Nightclub Newb. Never know, and don't regret anything that's happened.

So, like you said, it's the combination in most folks that makes the person into the avatar every loves (or hates).

Thanks again, Isadora

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Permalink Reply by Isadora Fiddlesticks on March 28, 2008 at 3:42am

...and a LOT of combinations--upbringing, culture, repressed ideologies, body issues even, too!

I love reading discussions like this and thinking about them. Great topic!

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Permalink Reply by Roger on March 28, 2008 at 7:23am

In SL (I don't have much experience in MMPRGs), I try to make my persona/avatar as close to myself as possible. (My approach is similar to Isadora's in this respect.) I really see SL's VR as a second life, rather than as a venue to act out my fantasies (my own imagination plus a good dose of SF reading is enough for that). To me it is an adjunct reality--I feel I am visiting another universe, rather like our own, but with some different rules (e.g., ability to fly). So I don't condemn those who like to act out fantasies--it makes the experience rather more interesting. But for myself, it's a way to add another dimension to my own life.

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Permalink Reply by Tom Paine on March 28, 2008 at 9:57am

People use virtual worlds in different ways. There's a lot of confusion in that, but also a lot of fun. I made my av so like me that I have been recognised in RL. It never occurred to me to do otherwise. I went there out of curiousity, and stayed to explore the technical possibilities and socialise with interesting people I met. I am not there to play games any more than I am in RL to play games (though I do so in both!).

Unless honestly playing a game with consenting parties (for which I would anyway usually use an alt) my av is what it says on his tin - he simply stands for me in the virtual world. He's not someone other; he's how I get there. That's not - of course - to say that everyone must use their av that way. On of my best online friends is such an avid and successful RP'er that people seek him out. His purpose is not to extend him into a virtual world, but to use that world to play at being someone else (actually lots of someone else's).

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Permalink Reply by HotPeridot on March 29, 2008 at 9:58pm

For the most part, my avi is the same as I am IRL. My avi has allowed me to 1) have lots of ear piercings; 2) have tattoos; 3) go with goth, vampire, lolita, etc. looks; 4) change hairstyles and colors daily or more often; etc. - things I do not have or do IRL. I even have a male avi with 2 saved outfits that I show to some of my buddies, but only after warning them I'm changing to my male avi. My personality is basically the same in my virtual worlds as IRL. My avi is a depiction of what I'd like to do or look like IRL but can't for various reasons. I do have other personnas elsewhere online and I am still myself for the most part there also. I sometimes wish I looked IRL like my avi sometimes looks. :)

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Permalink Reply by Jaysen Katscher on March 30, 2008 at 1:44am

So far, the majority of folks that are saying that they are very much themselves in the VW they frequent, maybe a difference or two in reactions compared to Outworld. Some taking an opportunity to explore what they might not be able for their real life.

Thanks for all the posts so far, keep em coming.

- Jaysen Katscher

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Permalink Reply by Tia Carr Williams on March 30, 2008 at 9:06am

I think Cindy Kesey makes some interesting observations.

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Permalink Reply by Jaysen Katscher on March 30, 2008 at 10:59am

Yes, I've noticed a bit of the 'beautiful people' syndrome. Cliques that won't give the time of day if you don't have a certain look or even worse treatment, in some instances, for being Jill or Joe Newbie. I have even been guilty, if you call it that, of getting a 'makeover' for newbs that come in. Taking them to all the places that many hours of camping would take to afford, asking them to 'pay it forward' and help the next one they see.

I think I am fortunate to have found a good group of people that look past what my avatar looks like. At the same time, I do catch myself picking apart avatars sometimes, guessing what stuff was 'business in a box' or freebies that they are wearing.

One of the inworld jobs I have is being a moderator for a set of sims modeled after a popular TV show. One of the events was ask the 'Top Ten Hottest Avatars in SL' to come hang out, I'm assuming this had been prearranged with them. Unfortunately, the attitude some brought along (or a girlfriend, in this case) was that of someone who thought they stepped in something foul.

Thanks for the link, Tia.

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Permalink Reply by Ricart Prats at iSLa Planet on March 31, 2008 at 4:34pm

I have chosen to act in world as I would act in RL. I even made sure that my profile points to my RL company's web site. So to answer your question ... I am as real as it's possible given the fact that in SL I can fly and TP and fall from high places without getting hurt ... (and the list goes on)

Ricart Prats at iSLa Planet

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Permalink Reply by Isadora Fiddlesticks on April 1, 2008 at 6:29am

i am also guilty of doing makeovers, but i do it so that i can show to the newbies that there is so many options in sl, more than what "change appearance" can give you. it empowers them somewhat, makes them feel confident. most of all, they don't camp out much anymore, but explore. much of the time newbies camp on the first couple of weeks in sl, never jumping right in to explore.

then there are some "oldbies" who insist on their "rezzday" look, refusing to take advantage of the limitless options. i say if you are in a virtual world, make the most out of it!

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Permalink Reply by LillyBeth Filth on April 2, 2008 at 11:53pm

I am exactly as I am in SL as I am in RL.
And allways have been,
But to many SL and other virtual worlds are escapsim to some degree or another.
Whether than be full on RP or just living the fantasy of being able to walk if your in a wheel chair in RL or to to be something as simple as young - blonde - slim - beautiful when in RL you may be none or some of those things.
This often only adds to the whole snobby or clique attitude. These "beautiful" people are more often the types that have or do experience this kind of rejection in RL whether that be a school / work etc so to be able to be the "beautiful bitch" in SL as a way to seek revenge for every hurtful word or experience they have had in RL due to their misfortunes.
Yes in a ideal world those very same people should of felt enough of rejection and how that feels not to impose it on others esp over shallow none real things...( doesnt take much money/time to make your virtual self beautiful ) but the reality is human nature tends to repeat the hurt we experience onto others, its a way to "get back" for all the pain they encountered in their youth or present life.
(Sorry If I am going off on the deep end here but I love the psycology behind "avatar" behavior and how it links to what their RL has been or is like for them)

Its unusual to find a mentally well balanced person in RL behaving so obsessed negatively with their looks in a VW ...it stems from an insecurity of the person "within" in RL imo


Even I am 15 yrs younger in appearance by my avatar than I am in RL so most ppl aren't "themselves" by default.
I think theres an addiction to SL and escapism because of this fantasy. If your RL is kind of crappy , your poor, unpopular, over weight, old , unattractive or THINK your any of the above...living the fantasy of being the opposite can easily because a preference over RL for many people.
If you watch the movie Brainstorm were people can record things in life such as sex with a beautiful woman or being a beautiful woman having sex with a man and then others buy that " exprience" on a DVD type tool they can play right into their "minds/brains" so they feel and see exactly what the 1st person experienced at the time of recording it....SL is a very primative version of things maybe to come.
Escapsim.
Living a fantasy.
The danger is when fantasy is preferable over real life...thats when you see the people who are sleeping at their PCs all day.
I find that very upsetting.
My RL isnt great, I have health issues and rarely leave the house but I havent lost grip of reality.
I just dont enjoy or buy into the whole RP business..maybe its because Im british lol
:)

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